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I’ve slowed down significantly with posting over the last few weeks. I just have not had the energy to do much more than the bare minimum that life requires of me. I know you understand what that is like, and I hope something in the energy department changes soon! I really don’t know what else to do, to get this fatigue under control.
This was one of the things on my list to address today at my doctor’s appointment. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to get any helpful suggestions. My concerns were heard, and acknowledged, and confirmed that this all falls under the FMS/CFS umbrella (which I knew), and that’s about all that happened. We went over what I am doing to manage my health, and how I am trying to get on top of my issues, and apparently I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing. I know it’s not my doctor’s fault, and it’s not my fault either, but I’m frustrated! We have exhausted the options we have available, and she reiterated that what we are trying to do is find the best way to manage my chronic illnesses. I get that, but it’s frustrating, none the less.
Something else that is irritating me, is how my questions get diverted. You know how easy it is to divert a fibromite’s attention right? Oh look…there’s a butterfly… and that’s enough to make me forget what I, or anyone else was talking about. It is not because my doctor lacks knowledge when it comes to FMS/CFS, so I don’t know why my questions are diverted. I’m distracted so easily, that I only realize after the fact, that I never got "true" answers to my questions, and it’s starting to piss me off. Don’t get me wrong, I actually really like my doctor, and she has gone over and above her call of duty, to try and get my illnesses turned around. I’m just having one of those days.
The primary reason for my appointment today was to get renewals on my pain meds. We drew the same conclusion today, as we have at every other appointment. We have not successfully found a way to manage my pain. No doubt? I’ve been on and off of more meds than I can count, and suffered some nasty side effects, to go with. My doc has been trying to persuade me for quite some time, to try Cymbalta. The problem is that it scares the hell out of me. I’ve heard a number of horror stories, and I’m terrified of the side effects. I understand that we haven’t found anything to manage my pain effectively to date, and obviously, nobody hates that fact more than I do! However, I can’t help but wonder if it is worth risking some of the side effects that one may experience with this drug? I should note that I do not tolerate meds very well. When do the benefits outweigh the risks?
I came across a "quality of life" chart a few weeks ago. I can’t even remember where I saw it, but I was shocked at my score. I knew that obviously I haven’t been able to live life to the fullest, but I think it is actually worse than even I have realized. On a scale of 1 – 10, I score from a 3 – 5, depending on the day :S
Perhaps I need to just trust that I’ll be okay to try this med, and maybe I’m ultra concerned about side effects because of previous experiences with other medications, but it’s hard to just ignore those concerns. I don’t think that turning a blind eye to the risks or being ignorant about it, will benefit me in any way. It’s never easy to go down that road, no many how many times you’ve done it. If you too have felt like a lab rat, you can understand exactly what angle I’m coming from.
I’ll think it through and talk it over with my hubby before I make a decision either way.
Do you have any first hand experience you would be willing to share about this medication? I would really like to hear what you have to say! Please leave me a comment, or email me privately at firstname.lastname@example.org
As always, I appreciate you stopping in, and taking the time to read at Chronic Connection.
~ Gentle Hugs